The only way to successfully overcome fear of any kind is to walk through the fear; to find empowerment on the other side as my friend Amy once told me. Keeping in mind that it is none of my business what others think of me - only what God thinks of me.
My message this morning was not necessarily intended to solicit a response, but it would have been nice. Well, it never came, and that's OK. I walked thru the fear by taking action. Totally above board and straightforward. I've sent the same message dozens of times to Charlie and Billy, but I won't deny that today my motives were at least halfway self-seeking. And I can't help but admit that this is not a great situation -- if I even know what great is. There are numerous reasons, all of which I have reminded myself time and time again. Happiness self-sabotage? No, more like honest inventories of both parties.
Yet, human nature is what it is - capable of forgetting/ignoring the obvious in favor of the perceived; the fantasy rather than reality; the lie in lieu of the truth.
God has a plan for both of us, and that is all I need to know. Let it unfold and accept that nothing happens without a reason. I don't need to know the why or even the why not - it just is what it is.
I am truly a blessed woman. I know that my happiness is not predicated on a man or a job or even the amount of money I have - the past has already shown me that truth. No, true happiness is an inside job that often involves a measure of growing pains. It's a by-product of peace in my head and light in my heart; the narrow way as my reflection for today noted. Funny how I read that exact same passage last night in "Sermon on the Mount." There are no coincidences - just God working incognito, as the old saying goes.
On the train from Antwerp, I muse over rather than run thru my feelings. No pavé diamond ring today, but I did my part to relieve the European economic crisis at the day spa. Makes those 15-hour shifts worthwhile.
I have walked thru my fear - my narrow gate, if you will - and arrived a happy and whole woman. There is a beautiful Corelli adagio softly playing in my ear as sunlight finally breaks thru the endless gray skies, and I realize that my head and heart are in sync. All is well.
Sent from my iPad
Tuesday, June 25, 2013
Monday, March 26, 2012
Omissions
Some would say that omission is merely manipulation--others would say it's just lying.
During the past week, the case of Trayvon Martin, a 17-year-old child who was shot and killed A MONTH A GO by George Zimmerman, a local neighborhood watch guy in Sanford, Fla., has ballooned into a public spectacle of people traipsing before TV cameras and marching through the streets demanding justice for Trayvon, making speeches about how the rights of black men everywhere are being stomped on, and even more disturbing, how "they" killed Trayvon. I'm still not sure who "they" are but I have a pretty good idea they're white. Our own president has even waded into the public fray--again--as if he doesn't have enough to do--saying that his son would look like Trayvon. Really? REALLY?
Today, news outlets are reporting that Trayvon was the real aggressor, punching Zimmerman in the face and breaking his nose and then pounding his head into the ground. Sanford police admit that they had this information, that it has been corroborated by witnesses and that it was indeed leaked by someone within their department.
So the question now becomes--who held back?
I'm not talking about Trayvon's suspension from a Miami area high school for holding an empty reefer bag. I'm not talking about hospital records to confirm a broken nose. I'm not even talking about why this case took a month to come to light. I'm talking about information that could have laid to rest a case that now has the potential to become a flashpoint for every hatemonger, bigot and racist in the country--black and white.
Unfortunately, I think the finger pointing has only just begun...
During the past week, the case of Trayvon Martin, a 17-year-old child who was shot and killed A MONTH A GO by George Zimmerman, a local neighborhood watch guy in Sanford, Fla., has ballooned into a public spectacle of people traipsing before TV cameras and marching through the streets demanding justice for Trayvon, making speeches about how the rights of black men everywhere are being stomped on, and even more disturbing, how "they" killed Trayvon. I'm still not sure who "they" are but I have a pretty good idea they're white. Our own president has even waded into the public fray--again--as if he doesn't have enough to do--saying that his son would look like Trayvon. Really? REALLY?
Today, news outlets are reporting that Trayvon was the real aggressor, punching Zimmerman in the face and breaking his nose and then pounding his head into the ground. Sanford police admit that they had this information, that it has been corroborated by witnesses and that it was indeed leaked by someone within their department.
So the question now becomes--who held back?
I'm not talking about Trayvon's suspension from a Miami area high school for holding an empty reefer bag. I'm not talking about hospital records to confirm a broken nose. I'm not even talking about why this case took a month to come to light. I'm talking about information that could have laid to rest a case that now has the potential to become a flashpoint for every hatemonger, bigot and racist in the country--black and white.
Unfortunately, I think the finger pointing has only just begun...
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
Only Love Lasts Forever
Yesterday, I lost my best friend and the love of my life of nearly 20 years. My Blackie Boy was always there, through sick and sin, and I will forever be grateful for the unconditional love he showed me for so very long. Goodbye my angel. Rest now, my sweet boy, until we are together again...
Mr. Blacks "Blackie" Harris
Aug. 6, 1992-Mar.12, 2012
In the arms of an angel fly away from here..." ~ Sarah McLaughlin
Mr. Blacks "Blackie" Harris
Aug. 6, 1992-Mar.12, 2012
In the arms of an angel fly away from here..." ~ Sarah McLaughlin
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